I was sitting at my desk, drawing out some blueprints for my next evil plan. Breaking out of Arkham had better be worth it, I was sick and tired of that meddling Batman always ruining my perfect plans.
Out of the corner of my eye I saw Harley edging towards me with a what-she-thought-looked seductive look on her face, I wish she'd give it a rest. Much to my annoyance she climbed onto my desk, seductively as she could and pouted at me.
"Go Away, I'm busy," I grumbled at her.
"Awww come on Puddin', Don't you wanna rev up your Harley?" she made her hand do a revving motion. "VROOM!" she squealed playfully. Not being in the mood for jokes I pushed her roughly off my desk, she landed with a loud squeal and frowned at me. "That wasn't very nice Mr J," she mumbled, rubbing her thigh, which she'd landed on.
"I don't care," I snapped at her, my green matted curls falling over my face as I worked.
"Awww Puddin' you know you love me really," she pouted, I grunted in response, god call yourself a fucking psychotherapist she was the one helping me go mad. I wanted...no needed to get away from her clingy-ness. Quickly I got up from my desk and shrugged into my purple tail suit jacket. "Where you going Puddin'?" she asked, tipping her head to the side curiously, the bells on her headpiece dinging.
"Out, don't wait up," I called out to her as I walked out of the door. Breathing a sigh of relief, I started walking into Gotham City. I was glad to be out of Arkham Asylum, glad to be back outside and not behind bars any more...well until Batman put me back there again. Come to think of it, I hadn't seen my pal Batsy for a while now, I would have to pay him a visit sometime. I stopped walking and looked up, finding myself outside the Gotham Observatory, it was closed for the night. Sighing I sat down on the steps that lead up to the front doors, allowing myself time to think and clear my crazy head.
I was driving back home after a long day of saving people. Being a superhero was hard work, it's not like I got any other help around here. Peter Parker was to busy making-out with his girlfriend Mary Jane and Clark fucking Kent was busy shagging his Lois Lane. I swear I was the only dedicated, hard working...Hang On. I braked hard beside Gotham Observatory, The Joker was sitting on the steps to the building, his head in his gloved hands. How the fuck did he manage to get out of Arkham...again.
Cursing under my breath, I climbed swiftly out of the Batmobile quietly so that I didn't alert the madman of my presence. Slowly I edged towards him, my suit keeping me hidden in the blackness of the night. Soon enough I had crept around him, so his back was facing me, I was just about to pounce when he turned around his chocolate brown eyes dancing with glee and his red painted lips twisting in a smile.
"We meet again Batsy," he never broke focus with me. "Did you miss me?" I didn't say anything, before he could react I fisted my hand in his shirt, jerking him roughly to his feet. I snapped a pair of handcuffs onto his wrists in front of his body and started pushing him towards the Batmobile. I opened the passenger door and shoved him inside, then climbed in beside him. I revved the engine and speeded deeper into Gotham, we sat in stony silence for awhile until he broke it with a long sigh.
"I suppose your taking me home, eh?" he asked, dropping his head so his green curls shielded his face.
"Home?" I echoed stupidly.
"Arkham?" he said, he sounded almost sad, like a little kid who had been denied something he wanted.
"Arkham's not a home it's a prison," I said firmly, determined not to feel sorry for the madman.
"Well it feels like home to me," he whispered, his gaze looked out the darkened windows of the car.
"What are you talking about Joker?" I asked in disbelief.
"Just think about it, I've been locked up in that place for a good time of my life, I practically live there," For the first time in his life, I thought the Joker was actually making sense and despite my intentions I was feeling sorry for him. I sighed and made my decision, instead of taking the turning that would lead me to Arkham Asylum I took the other one that would lead me home and back to the Batcave. "Were are we going?" The Joker asked, sitting up in the passenger seat a little. "Arkham's back that way," he commented.
"I'm not taking you to Arkham...not yet," I answered, his mouth dropped open in surprise.
"Were are you taking me then?" he asked curiously.
"I'm taking you home with me," I said, I knew I was going to regret this.
"Ohhhhh!" he squealed, jumping in his seat like a little girl. "Like a sleepover?" I snorted and rolled my eyes at his childish comment, I braked a little and took off my cape wrapping it like a blindfold around his eyes. Just in case he wanted to find me again in the future. I drove down into the cave and parked the Batmobile, The Joker was just sitting there in silence...just how I liked it. I climbed out my car and slammed the door then opened the passenger one, pulling Joker out. "Ouch!" he squealed. "You don't always have to be quite so rough Batsy," I rolled my eyes and pushed him towards the platform which took us up to the main house. I flipped the switch on the bust of Shakespeare and the bookcase slid closed, hiding the Batcave from the Jokers peeping eyes, only then did I remove the makeshift blindfold from him. "Ohhh you live in this high rise?" he ran his hand over the table and rubbed his fingers together, like he was checking for dust.
"Don't touch anything, and stay here" I warned and walked off to get changed. I knew it was risky leaving him on his own here but there was nothing else I could do.
I watched Batsy walk off, for reasons unknown. Shrugging, I walked around a bit not wanting to touch anything, not because he had told me not to, because all the shit in his house was at least a grand a piece, not to mention I was in handcuffs as well. I sat down awkwardly on one of the sofas, looking around I realised I didn't belong here I belonged in Arkham, were the walls were white and cold and the only piece of furniture you had was a metal, rickety bed. What the fuck was taking Batsy so long? I grumbled and got up from the sofa walking in the direction the Bat had. It lead me to a bedroom, very well furnished and spacious not like the cells in Arkham that I was used to. I heard the sound of a shower starting from the other door in the room, smiling I walked towards it and opened it. Batsy jerked in surprise and grabbed a towel to cover his...nakedness, he was still wearing the mask but the rest of him, all bare.
"What are you doing?" he snapped at me. "I thought I told you to stay in the sitting room,"
"Tut Tut Tut Batsy," I teased. "Having a shower without offering me one? How uncourteous of you,"
He just gaped at me, well I think he was gaping I couldn't really tell with that damned mask of his.
"Mind if I join?" I asked, cocking an eyebrow at him, he didn't say 'no'. "So you mind if you urm...take me out of these?" I jiggled the 'cuffs at him and he gave himself a shake before retrieving the key from his suit pants, then he stopped and an idea seemed to enter his head. He tossed the key on the side away from him and advanced towards me. "Wha-" I was cut off as he made a 'Shhh' motion with his finger. He wetted his hand with water from the sink beside us and trailed that hand down the right side of my face, washing half the facepaint off my face.
A new Joker stared back at me tonight. On one side of his face he still wore the ridiculous facepaint making him look psychotic and crazy but the side I had wiped clean was just a child's face staring back at me. A child who had been neglected and beaten by his father.
"Are you going to show your face?" he asked, his handcuffed hands already at the bottom of my mask.
I nodded and let him push the mask off of my head, it fell to the floor with a sharp thud and rolled to the corner of the bathroom, forgotten. He tipped his head to one side, studying me with his chocolate brown eyes. I knew that I must of looked in pretty bad nick, with my short hair sticking up due to the mask and my eye liner smudged all over the place. He smiled at me, not one of those crazy smiles he normally does but a genially happy one it made me smile back. "Ohhh arnt you just gorgeous?" he cooed at me, back to his original madness, it made me smile all the same.
"Your not so bad yourself," I teased, it was remarkable how I felt so at ease with this after years of fighting and trying to kill one another. But it didn't feel weird it felt right, this whole stupid feud between us had been keeping us from truly being together but now he was here with me we finally could. I reached along the side and found the key to the handcuffs, I undid them and he shook them off himself his gloved hands reaching up to touch my face.
Now the big, bad Bat had revealed himself to me, I thought we might as well take it further. I reached up my now free hands and trailed my fingers lightly down his jawline, he fluttered his blue eyes closed as I ran my fingertips around his face, over his cheekbones, nose, eyes and mouth. He was beautiful, and not your phoney twilight beautiful but as in Greek god gorgeous. I had never really noticed it before, I'd been to busy trying to doge punches and weapons from his utility belt. But now that utility belt was gone, I could really appreciate the picture that was Batman.
"Are we going to have this shower then?" I asked, running my hand through his short, black locks.
"I had a better idea," he murmured a devious twinkle forming in his blue eyes.
"What's your plan?" I asked.
"Well first we can have a shower-" he brushed my green locks back over my shoulder.
"Then?" I prompted.
"We can go to bed," he grinned, his big hands latching onto my hips and pulling me closer against him.
"Can we do that but in reverse?" I teased and he laughed, releasing me to start the shower.
Joker was undressing as I started washing myself, it gave me an opportune moment to watch him though. So far he had his shoes, jacket and gloves off and he was now working on the orange Arkham prison uniform, the buttons on it popped open easily and he slid the top half off his tanned body out of the jumpsuit. Despite him being smaller then me, he was in good shape and the black Outlaw tattoo running over his stomach was pretty hot if I must admit. He smirked as he caught me looking at him and stepped out of the bottom half of the uniform, my eyes widened as I realised he went commando.
For once I envied Harley Quinn....
"Your staring at me Batsy," he said in a sing-song voice, I rolled my eyes and mentioned for him to get under the hot spray of the shower with me. He complied, stepping under the shower head the green dye in his hair washing reluctantly away and the remainders of his facepaint melting off. He scooped some of the water and splashed it over his face, the facepaint now just a distant memory. Being moderately clean myself, I was eager to help him wash so I made a 'turn around' motion with my finger. His feet made a squeaking sound against the wet tiles as he obeyed, I gently gathered his green locks and rubbed soap and water into his mane, watching as the green withered away from it leaving a black waterfall in my hands. I turned the dial of the shower letting the water melt away, I squeezed the excess water out of his hair and reached for a fluffy towel to pat him dry with. He turned around and did the same drying me while I dried him. When we were both dry enough I scooped him up into my arms and walked out the bathroom with him then dropped him lightly onto my bed.
I was dropped lightly onto the sea of a bed, the action so tender you wouldn't have thought it came from Gotham's best crime fighter. I reached out my arms towards him and he gladly came into them, our mouths met for the first time. His mouth moved softly against my own, his lip piercing rubbing between us occasionally. He pulled away from me, to my disappointment but that died however when I felt his warm, wet tongue dart over my stomach, tracing my tattoo. I tangled my hands in his short hair and pulled his head back up so our mouths could meet again, this time I broke the kiss and twisted so I was on my knees then I pushed him down onto the bed, so I could straddle him. His hands grabbed onto my hips as I gently moved them round in circles on his lap, his face being buried into my neck as I felt the flesh between his legs grow harder with each of my movements. He groaned under me and took his face out from my neck so his lips could meet with mine, our tongues sliding out to meet each other. I felt one of his hands wrap firmly around my own manhood, jerking along it with fast movements. I moaned desperately into his mouth, feeling my protective walls crumble. I might as well just give myself to this man, this man who I was brought to loathe but grown to love. Gently I pushed his hands away, his expression was priceless as I kissed my way down his slender body until I reached his hardening length. Giving him a look that was just pure evil, I bent my head a fraction just to suck the tip of him into my mouth, he gave a gasp that was so sexy it almost made me moan around him. I bobbed my head up and down his length, feeling him grow impossibly harder, hearing his little breathless moans. Satisfied that he was well lubricated, I turned around so my back faced him then dropped to all fours, arching my back and looking over my shoulder at him. I heard a rustle of sheets then a warm male body pressed against me as he knelt behind my body, his fingers reached around to my mouth rubbing along my bottom lip. Getting the message I sucked two of them deep into my mouth, getting them nice and wet for him. He smirked and pulled them out of my mouth, his hands descending down to my thighs which he nudged apart a little. I felt one of his fingers push gently into me, I whimpered a little trying to get used to the feeling of being slightly stretched, he kissed me softly on the back of my neck before he started slowly moving the finger inside of me. It felt slightly strange at first but it started to get good as he continued with his slow torturous movements, by now he had probably sensed that I had gotten used to it and I felt another finger join his quest. Whimpering in pleasure, I started to try and push my hips back to meet him but he smirked and pulled them out of me. I gasped in shock and turned around to face him, narrowing my eyes at him for halting my pleasure. He winked at me and I felt something much bigger then two fingers slip into me, his hand rested on my stomach and pressed upwards. I took the hint and rose my body so his chest was pressed against my back, his hands gripped the top of my thighs and spread my legs so my feet were either side of his thighs. Satisfied I was positioned to his liking, he fisted a hand in my hair pulling my head back so it lolled on his muscular shoulder and his arm encircled around my waist keeping me pressed tightly against him. Only then did he start to slowly move, his mouth covered mine as he bounced me on top of him, our skin making sharp, echoing slapping sounds as we moved together in a symphony of moans and groans. Sensations I had never felt before uncurled in my gut, tingling sparks and heat coursed up my spine as he touched every nerve ending inside of me. Our lips were pulled roughly apart, his moans now echoing the room accompanied by mine, my eyes rolled tightly shut and my mouth seemed to be unable to close.
I could hardly believe that I was fucking my arch enemy, but here he was on top of me his shuddering moans echoing out from his gaping mouth and his chocolate brown eyes hidden by tanned eyelids, framed with thick, smouldering eyelashes. I bit my way up his neck, wanting to mark him as my claim. I felt him tense then gasp loudly as I slid over the throbbing bundle of nerves deep inside of him, I smiled and looked at his face contorted with pleasure. I took his thin lips in another kiss, a battle against tongues and lips fighting for some control over one another, I let my hands grab his hips tighter and made my thrusts harder so I could repeatedly hit that spot. He was now shuddering and clawing at me in sexual ecstasy, his hair plastered against his shiny forehead.
"Batsy," he warned, but it came out like a gasp. I knew what he wanted, smiling I reached down between our bodies to grab his arousal, stroking it in time to my thrusts. He screamed out scant moments after I had begun, his voice vibrating off the walls as he climaxed with me. We sat there in the aftermath, panting and sweating like we had just ran a marathon. I gently lifted him off me, his body releasing me reluctantly, he lay on the cool sheets his heartbeat gradually slowing down. His brown eyes finally opened again and pierced me with a look of sated desire, slowly he crawled towards me again and curled up in my sweaty arms, fitting snugly.
"You don't regret this do you Batsy?" he whispered, sounding like a scared child.
"No," I said firmly, kissing on the top of his head. "I don't regret anything,"